We all know that it is not necessary to pump your own gas in the great state of New Jersey. This is a brilliant concept for those who live in NJ, and stay in NJ, but once a New Jerseyan crosses the border into Pennsylvania, New York, or Delaware, going to the gas station is a whole different ballgame. No longer is it a quick, painless trip; it becomes a full-on battle of ‘you vs. the gas pump’. The following is a guide for New Jerseyans on how to properly pump gas, so that when presented with the challenge, the outcome will not result in tangled hoses, gas stained hands, or the genius question of: ‘do I pay before or after I pump?!’. After you read this guide you will be just as capable of skillfully pumping gas like our nice neighbors (and, maybe, even better!).

First Things First: Know which side of the car your gas tank door is on. It is quite embarrassing to drive up to a pump, turn off your car and get out, only to realize that you need to get back into your car and move to the other side of the pump. Save yourself the trouble, and embarrassment, – remember what side your gas tank door is on!

Okay, Another First Thing: Keep baby wipes in your middle consul. After you are finished pumping your gas you can use them to wipe your hands and get rid of the smell the gas pump left behind.

How to Handle the Gas Pump Kiosk: Remember to read the instructions on the gas pump kiosk – they are there for a reason! Many gas stations require that you pay before you pump. So, if you are paying by credit card you will most likely need to swipe your card and then proceed with the rest of the process. If you are paying by cash you will need to go inside the store, tell the attendant how much gas you want, and then pay before you go back out to your station to pump.

Once You Have Paid: Here is where the fun begins! You need to specify which type of gas you would like to pump (regular, premium, or super). Some kiosks will ask you this and make the process easy, but for others you just need to know to press the correlating button above the gas hose that pumps out the specific gas you want.

Making the Hose Work: In order to do this you will need to lift the hose’s handle off of its stand in the kiosk and then insert the nozzle of the hose into the gas tank opening. Make sure that the nozzle is secure – you don’t need it falling off and pouring gas out everywhere! Next, there will either be a switch or button on the pump to allow the gas to flow. Press/switch it. In order to get the gas through the nozzle of the hose you will need to pull up on the trigger located in the handle of the hose (you will know what this is when you grasp the handle). Some of the triggers will lock, allowing the gas to move into the gas tank freely (which mean you can clean your windows or go get a snack). However, some of them do not have a lock and will make you hold down the trigger until the gas is finished pumping.

When It’s Done, It’s Done: You will know when your gas tank is full (or when you have reached your $ limit) when the gas stops pumping and you hear a loud ‘clunk’ sound (this is the pump shutting off). Remove the nozzle and place the handle back onto its proper place in the kiosk. Remember to screw your gas cap back on (and listen for the loud ‘click, click, click’ – when you hear that sound the gas cap is firmly screwed on)!

That’s all there is to it! You are now an expert gas pumper!

Remember: Always shut your car completely off before pumping gas!!